Thursday, April 13, 2006

The Big Wup

I don't know about you but all this chatter about "quiet birth" and the impending arrival of the golden babies is kinda stale. But the thing that really baffles me is this whole notion of quiet birth. Apparently the fascination with it means that people really do believe what they see in movies and on TV: that women in labor yell, scream and curse with every contraction. As a veteran, I can say with confidence that some not all women yell, scream and curse. And usually this occurs when the baby is crowning. Trust me, if you had to push something the size of a large navel orange through your hoo-haa without an epidural, you'd scream too.

I was quiet because the pain was suffocating. I couldn't muster the energy to let out a lusty "f%$!-s@#*-b&%*!-motherf%$!er" if I had wanted to. Every contraction sucked me under to bat me around until it spat me back out for an all-too short reprieve before doing it again.

So get over it people. Katie and Angelina will be fine without you looking over the curtain.


Louise said...

Ha! Amen, sister. I didn't scream during labor. Just kept whimpering and clawing at the bed, wishing I could escape my body for a little while. Then came the epidural. Aaaah....


Erica Orloff said...

Hey Mary:
I never screamed either. I moaned a LOT, but that's about it. I've had four kids . . . each birth was different (just like each pregnancy). What I don't like about this whole Tom Cruise fascination/silent birth crap is yet again this idea that somehow some methods are "better," or that a woman who asks for medication somehow has "failed." It's what works for each, and like you said, now let's move on people. :-)

Dana Diamond said...

Okay, one thing I love about pregnancy and childbirth is that you just never know what your gonna get.

I never screamed. One nurse even told me I was very civilized. But I was so surprised that I needed to hit things. That poor hospital bed will never be the same. Maybe Katie will have a least it's quiet

:) d

Priscilla said...

Not related to your post, but was curious if you will be coming to San Diego for your book tour. If so, let me know where and when.